The diaries are about David's two Christmas seasons working as an elf in Macy's department store on New York's Herald Square. When it was first broadcast, it generated more requests for tapes than any story in Morning Edition's history except the death of Red Barber.
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Chicago performance artist John Conners reads from a 1942 book called How To Improve Your Personality, from a chapter instructing men on how to avoid being sissies.
Chicago writer Cheryl Trykv on her own close encounter with Hollywood, the media, and a famous maid.
When Danielle's family serves poultry at their dinner table, no one utters the word "chicken." Instead, it is always called "fish." Danielle explains why with the help of her friend "Duki." (16 minutes)
Excerpts from lessons found on old record, especially a Helen Gurley Brown disc called How to Love a Man, which instructs men on how to have an affair.
Ira continues his story.
David Sedaris reads from his story "Naked." (21 minutes)
Dael Orlandersmith's funny, moving story from her Obie-award winning show Beauty's Daughters. Though she's an African-American woman, she transforms herself in this story into a loudmouthed Italian guy. At a wedding, this character meets a woman who reminds him of who he was before he got married and had kids: a guy who loved jazz, a different guy than he is now.
Former Saturday Night Live writer Robert Smigel — who impersonates Dole on Late Night with Conan O'Brien and the deceased Dana Carvey Show — gives step-by-step instructions on how to imitate the Republican nominee.
We give Danny Drennan, the writer behind the website Inquisitor Mediarama, a little assignment.
David Sedaris reads one of his funniest and most affecting stories from his book Naked before a live audience. As an adolescent boy, David feared he might be a homosexual.
Sketches from the neo-futurists on the subject of double lives.
Julia talks about her brother Michael's cancer. He was diagnosed with non-Hodgkins lymphoma, stage four.
In the second half of the show, she talks about her own cancer — cervical cancer that was diagnosed six months after her brother got sick. Julia eventually turned some of these vignettes into a one-woman show called God Said, Ha!, which Quentin Tarantino made into a movie and Julia released as a book.