We use cookies and other tracking technologies to enhance your browsing experience. If you continue to use our site, you agree to the use of such cookies. For more info, see our privacy policy.
Skip to main content

Hi. We love you. Be our Life Partner.

Support the show to get ad-free listening, bonus content, and our new Greatest Hits Archive.

Learn more
This American Life Partners logo
00:00
00:00
  • Transcript
  • Share
This American Life
  • Life Partners
  • How to Listen
  • Episodes
  • Recommended
  • About
    • Overview
    • Staff
    • Announcements
    • Fellowships
    • Jobs
    • Music
    • Make Radio
    • On The Road
    • FAQ
    • Submissions
    • Merch
    • Contact Us
    • Our Other Shows
  • Merch
  • Follow Us
  • Life Partners
245
September 5, 2003

Allure of the Mean Friend

What is it about them, our mean friends? They treat us badly, they don't call us back, they cancel plans at the last minute, and yet we come back for more. Popular bullies exist in business, politics, everywhere. How do they stay so popular?

  • Download
    Control-click (or right-click) Tap and hold to download
  • Subscribe on Spotify Subscribe in Apple Podcasts Subscribe
  • Transcript
Thomas Ricker

Prologue

We hear kids recorded at Chicago's Navy Pier and at a public swimming pool, talking about their mean friends. Host Ira Glass interviews Lillie Allison, 15, about the pretty, popular girls who were her best friends—until they cast her out. (5 minutes)

By

Ira Glass
Act One

Return To The Scene Of The Crime

Jonathan Goldstein interrogates the girls, now grown up, who terrorized him and his classmates years ago in school—and finds they can be just as scary as ever. Jonathan Goldstein is the author of the novel Lenny Bruce is Dead. (18 minutes)

By

Jonathan Goldstein

Song:

“Hello Goodbye” by The Beatles
Act Two

Does Niceness Pay?

In which we conduct a little scientific experiment—on tape, with hidden microphones—about whether niceness pays. We wire two waitresses with hidden microphones. They're superfriendly to half their tables; and aloof to the other half. They examine their tips to see which generates more profits. Thanks to owners Jason Hammel and Lea Tshilds and the staff at the Lula Cafe in Chicago's Logan Square neighborhood. (10 minutes)

By

Ira Glass

Song:

“Untied” by Tallulah
Act Three

And What's Going On With You?

A case study in every word from a friend meaning its opposite. An excerpt from the short story "The Underminer." A book based on the story is forthcoming from Bloomsbury USA. The story was written by Mike Albo and Virginia Heffernan. (4 minutes)

By

Mike Albo
Act Four

Keeping It In The Family

An excerpt of Bernard Cooper's story about the bill he got from his own father, for the entire cost of his childhood. Actor Josh Hamilton reads. The story first appeared in Los Angeles Magazine and will be in Cooper's forthcoming book The Bill From My Father. Bernard Cooper is the author of several books, including Truth Serum: Memoirs and Guess Again: Short Stories. (19 minutes)

By

Bernard Cooper
Josh Hamilton

Related

If you enjoyed this episode, you may like these
155: Hoaxing Yourself (2000)
Mar. 17, 2000

Act Three: Outperforming The Performers

A story about the Broadway show Rent, the thrill of sitting close to the stage...and the evil it can lead to.
154: In Dog We Trust (2000)
Mar. 10, 2000

Act Two: If Cats Ran Hollywood

What do cats want to see on television? Steve Malarky, creator of the world's best-selling home video for cats, tells all.
11: Enemies
Jan. 24, 1996

Act Two: Dave's Hatred

The story of Dave and Bob continues.

Staff Recommendations

View all
492
Apr. 12, 2013

Dr. Gilmer and Mr. Hyde

Did a beloved family doctor with no criminal history suddenly up and strangle his own father?

513
Dec. 13, 2013

129 Cars

One car dealership tries to make its monthly quota: 129 cars. It is way more chaotic than we expected.

This American Life

This American Life is produced in collaboration with WBEZ Chicago and delivered to stations by PRX The Public Radio Exchange.

  • How to Listen
  • Episodes
  • Recommended
  • About
    • Overview
    • Staff
    • Announcements
    • Fellowships
    • Jobs
    • Music
    • Make Radio
    • On The Road
    • FAQ
    • Submissions
    • Merch
    • Contact Us
    • Our Other Shows
  • Merch
  • Contact
  • Life Partners
  • Serial
  • S-Town
© 1995 - 2025 This American Life Privacy Policy | Terms of Use

Share

  • Facebook
  • Twitter
  • Email

Subscribe

  • on Spotify
  • in Apple Podcasts

Share

  • Facebook
  • Twitter
  • Email